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funeral expenses
 Moderated by: Jim Anderson, Dave Armstrong  

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kimdyuma
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Joined: Mon Oct 9th, 2006
Location: Arizona USA
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First Name: Kim
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 Posted: Fri Feb 29th, 2008 04:30 pm

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If a person has been a long time comitted member of the parish ( like 30 years) and the church (life long) typically for a funreal mass with just a guitarist, some altar servers ( 4 from the attached school) and the Msr. Along with the knights of Columbus How much are the church related costs (ballpark) Does the church charge for the funeral everything I have list above or do we offer a donation? One of my sponser's died this week and his wife had the above funeral along with a visitation and Rosary at the funeral home the night before. Her family was against having anything more than a memorial service due to the cost.  My friend is being cremated so there was a rented casket  and a hearse to the church but all that I assume is funeral home  costs not church except for the Rosary



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CajunRick
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Joined: Fri Sep 29th, 2006
Location: Houma, Louisiana USA
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 Posted: Fri Feb 29th, 2008 06:36 pm

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kimdyuma wrote: If a person has been a long time comitted member of the parish ( like 30 years) and the church (life long) typically for a funreal mass with just a guitarist, some altar servers ( 4 from the attached school) and the Msr. Along with the knights of Columbus How much are the church related costs (ballpark) Does the church charge for the funeral everything I have list above or do we offer a donation? One of my sponser's died this week and his wife had the above funeral along with a visitation and Rosary at the funeral home the night before. Her family was against having anything more than a memorial service due to the cost.  My friend is being cremated so there was a rented casket  and a hearse to the church but all that I assume is funeral home  costs not church except for the Rosary

I can't speak for other parishes, but in mine, there would be a charge for the musician.  Also, it is customary to give a small "tip" to the altar servers.  Our parish does charge if visitation is held in church (for the air conditioning and so on) but that fee is usually waived for active parishioners.  Also, our musicians usually donate their services for a poor family or for active parishioners.  When my father-in-law died, we held the visitation in church and the burial in the church cemetary.  The vault was already paid for, and all parish fees were waived.  I think my mother-in-law gave the priest $100, which he gave to the secretary to pay for masses said in his memory (33 of them, at $3.00 each).  That means the parish "profit" was $1.00.



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Rick Luquette
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kimdyuma
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Joined: Mon Oct 9th, 2006
Location: Arizona USA
Posts: 710
First Name: Kim
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Faith History: cradle Anglican, Episcopal /Catholic-04/07/07
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 Posted: Fri Feb 29th, 2008 07:12 pm

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The reason why I was asking is becuase things started to get alittle heated- there is no money so it would be extended family paying for the funeral and they are not practicing Catholics- She was told basically at first well we can't do "the Catholic thing" since the church will want to much etc etc and a full funeral will cost upwards of 5 to 10 K by the time you pay for the church, the priest etc etc. I had said - you know before you rule out "the Catholic" thing why don't you talk to the Parish, the funeral home etc. In my opinion it is like a wedding you can spend thousand easily to have it all or you can spend way less and still have a tasteful nice wedding.



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CajunRick
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 Posted: Fri Feb 29th, 2008 07:59 pm

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kimdyuma wrote: The reason why I was asking is becuase things started to get alittle heated- there is no money so it would be extended family paying for the funeral and they are not practicing Catholics- She was told basically at first well we can't do "the Catholic thing" since the church will want to much etc etc and a full funeral will cost upwards of 5 to 10 K by the time you pay for the church, the priest etc etc. I had said - you know before you rule out "the Catholic" thing why don't you talk to the Parish, the funeral home etc. In my opinion it is like a wedding you can spend thousand easily to have it all or you can spend way less and still have a tasteful nice wedding.
Money will not prevent anyone from a Catholic funeral.  If the priest insists on payment, find another parish.  It is possible that a volunteer musician might not be available, but I've never known one who insisted on being paid if the family couldn't afford it.  The funeral home is another matter, but they will usually work with the family to keep costs as low as possible.

Some fees, like hearse rental, can be avoided if the body is cremated.

We have been known to take up special collections in my parish to pay the funeral expenses if the family can't afford them, and we have given free burial in our cemetary.  Once when a family lost their house, their car, and a child in a fire, our collection covered all of the funeral expenses plus left them with enough to buy a used car and a considerable amount of clothing.

Remember that the anti-Catholic rhetoric is that the Church is filled with money-grubbers.  Talk to the priest and let him show them how wrong they are.



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Understanding is the reward of faith. Therefore seek not to understand that you may believe, but believe that you may understand. - Augustine

Rick Luquette
Luquette Lane

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kimdyuma
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Joined: Mon Oct 9th, 2006
Location: Arizona USA
Posts: 710
First Name: Kim
Gender: Female
Faith History: cradle Anglican, Episcopal /Catholic-04/07/07
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 Posted: Fri Feb 29th, 2008 08:18 pm

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Thanks Rick- the funeral was actually yesterday- I don't believe the whole thing cost that much different from the no ceremony memorial that the extended famlly wanted and it was "CAtholic" enough to help my friend. I was just asking becuase off the knee jerk reactions  of the others. I don't know but I don't think that Protestant churches charge either



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