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Hidden One
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 02:41 am |
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The priest's eyes were scary. On the other hand, I spent msot my time confessing looking at the floor. On the whole, the eyes were really the only big problem. And now I'm forgiven. I'm good with that.
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1 John 4:7-12
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David W. Emery
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 02:57 am |
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My bet is that after a few visits those eyes will seem much more kindly, and you and the priest will be good friends.
David
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Intercessor
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| First Name: | Becky | | Gender: | Female | | Faith History: | Southern Baptist, Catholic |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 03:19 am |
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David is right, H1.
At my first confession I had two pages of notes, typed, single-spaced, small font. By the time I got to the act of contrition, I was so overcome with emotion my voice disappeared except for the barest whisper. What a patient priest!
Since that first confession, though, now I always emerge praising God for His mercy in providing the sacrament of penance.
Becky
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"If our charity is arrested by the difficulties encountered in dealing with our neighbor, . . . our relations with our brethren are not regulated by our love of God, but by our love of self." Divine Intimacy p. 781, Fr. Gabriel, O.C.D.
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Hidden One
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 03:32 am |
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When I tired to print off the notes I had and the rest of the Examination of Conscience I was using as I was running late, my printer died. So I ended up using the much shorter, scrupulous-person-friendly examination I had on a pamphlet in my actual Confession. (I also ended up using a slightly enlengthened version of the Act of Contrition on my pamphlet, the one starting "Oh my God, I am heartily sorry", rather than the one I -like-. Fr. never remarked on my slight enlentghenings, so I figured they were fine. (Like saying "Lord my God" instead of "God".) My confessing went by quickly, as I didn't have 4+ pages of single-spaced 12 pt. Times New Roman notes to read off. My Confession, as best I know, was still valid, I just confessed more broadly and confessed mostly systematic venial and/or all my mortal sins rather than confessing 'lessser' venial sins in more detail.
But anyway, I'm forgiven, and that famous line "I'm forgiven, because You were forsaken" won't get out of my head.
My discordant, poorly-edited and non-linearly written rambling is done now. Everyone should go to Confession. They won't regret it.
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1 John 4:7-12
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Intercessor
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| First Name: | Becky | | Gender: | Female | | Faith History: | Southern Baptist, Catholic |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 04:06 am |
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You did great, H1.
So you had four pages to my two pages, huh?
Well, you know what? Although I worked on my examination of conscience for months (thought I'd never be given permission to go to confession!), I realized the day after my first confession that I had failed to include sins of selfishness and impatience. Who knows how many more pages that would have added!  No problem since it was an honest forgetting and since I included those sins at the next confession.
You are right, of course, about the broad categories of sins being sufficient. My priest had also been my catechist and had encouraged me ahead of time to include in my first confession anything I wanted to "get rid of." At this point, I am comfortable speaking more broadly and can leave it to the confessor to decide whether he needs more details.
Thanks for sharing your experience with us, H1. All the folks on this forum who are coming into the Church (or who are seriously considering it) have been in my prayers. I've been lighting a candle for you when I go to the shrine.
God bless,
Becky
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"If our charity is arrested by the difficulties encountered in dealing with our neighbor, . . . our relations with our brethren are not regulated by our love of God, but by our love of self." Divine Intimacy p. 781, Fr. Gabriel, O.C.D.
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Credo Catholic
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| Joined: | Sat May 5th, 2007 |
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| First Name: | Marsha | | Gender: | Female | | Faith History: | Baptist, Catholic |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 04:26 am |
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Hidden One wrote: Everyone should go to Confession. They won't regret it.
Amen! How on earth do some people go for six or eight months without confession? And why would they?
Tonight I sat on the bench waiting my turn to go in, dreading the thought of speaking my sins out loud.  And then I knew, God knows my sins anyway, so what was I worried about? I can only do this by speaking to the priest as I would speak to the Lord, no holds barred. If he's shocked or disappointed then maybe he's in the wrong line of work! And, he's always kind and willing to give a little advice in addition to my penance. I would bet that none of the members here have lost their sense of exuberance after confession, no matter how many times they've been.
Congratulations HiddenOne! The world at large seems to think you have this dreary duty to do every now and then to keep the RCC happy with you. But now you know the truth, what an awesome privilege you have been given. I recommend you avail yourself of the sacraments of reconciliation and the Eucharist as often as possible, to continually receive the graces Christ bestows on us through them. God bless
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BillK
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 02:07 pm |
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My children went through RCIA a couple years ago. A couple months after the Easter Vigil, while reflecting on the joy I receive in the Eucharist, I asked my kids if they've ever had such an intense experience of joy that they felt their heart would explode. My 11 year old daughter said "yeah! it was after going to confession!!!!".
What an awesome sacrament!!!! I was so afraid that my children would hate it like I did when I was a kid. I never had good catechesis as a child so I spent extra time with my kids, making sure they really understood so they wouldn't have the same fears I did as a child. When I take them to confession (we call it the "Penance Celebration"), I tell them they have to come with me but confessing to the priest is entirely up to them. They go up every time!!!! Praise God for his love and mercy!!!
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Annie
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| Joined: | Wed Feb 14th, 2007 |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 03:04 pm |
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I like going to Reconciliation too.
Your experience is interesting because priests are not supposed to make eye contact, even in a "face to face" confession. They generally lean forward and look downward.
I had one with those scary cold gray eyes once.
My priest made eye contact last week but he fiddled nervously with his rosary so I sorta felt sorry for him.
Last edited on Thu Mar 20th, 2008 03:07 pm by Annie
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Annie
Ora et labora
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rbo4u2
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| Joined: | Tue Jan 16th, 2007 |
| Location: | Sunnyvale, California USA |
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| First Name: | Rich | | Gender: | Male | | Faith History: | Formerly Christian & Missionary Alliance then became Presbyterian |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 05:25 pm |
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Annie wrote: My priest made eye contact last week but he fiddled nervously with his rosary so I sorta felt sorry for him.
Have you ever wondered if your confession may have reminded the priest that he needs to confess the same sin when he goes to confession? After all, they are human too! I'm sure that not a few priests have to cleanse their thoughts on occasion after listening to so many "sins" of their paritioners. I don't mean to be facetious. I know they are taught to forget as Christ forgets our sins. But I'll bet, because they are men of God, they are attacked by old slew foot more than we think. That's why I keep them in my prayers. I know our Protestant pastors often say the same thing.
I look forward to the day when I'm told by the priest that my sins are forgiven.
Rich
Attachment: adoration.jpg (Downloaded 54 times)
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CajunRick
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 05:54 pm |
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Annie wrote: Your experience is interesting because priests are not supposed to make eye contact, even in a "face to face" confession.
They always make eye contact with me 'cause I know them all! But you're right, after greeting me, they will look down and usually shield their eyes, sort of in a "hand to brow" gesture. I wonder if they practice that posture in the seminary?
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Understanding is the reward of faith. Therefore seek not to understand that you may believe, but believe that you may understand. - Augustine
Rick Luquette
Luquette Lane
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Annie
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| First Name: | Annie | | Gender: | Female | | Faith History: | nothing, Quaker, Mennonite, Presbyterian, Methodist, Anglican, Catholic |
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 06:37 pm |
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CajunRick wrote: I wonder if they practice that posture in the seminary?
Yes, it's covered in Postures and Gestures 201 (practicum).
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Annie
Ora et labora
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Hidden One
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Posted: Thu Mar 20th, 2008 08:37 pm |
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So you had four pages to my two pages, huh?
Would've, given how it was going, but having to actually get off the computer and go [to RCIA for Confession] only gave me about a page. Which I'm about to go delete.
Your experience is interesting because priests are not supposed to make eye contact, even in a "face to face" confession. They generally lean forward and look downward.
He may have feared my reaction to him looking at the floor, considering how ashamed I was.
Edit: clarity, fixed random code, and I've now deleted those notes, without reading them.
Last edited on Thu Mar 20th, 2008 08:44 pm by Hidden One
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1 John 4:7-12
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Parodyonlife
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| First Name: | John | | Gender: | Male | | Faith History: | NEW CATHOLIC!!! W( ) ( )T!!! |
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 04:15 pm |
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I feel wierd cause my Priest stared in my eyes the whole time i was suprised if he even looked away the whole time. I didn't feel he was in persona Christi either and neither did any of the other cantidates. So my first confession was VERY frustrating in the fact i didnt get a box confessional i didnt quite feel forgiven and i didn't even get penance. So umm yeah.
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Hidden One
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 04:35 pm |
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I feel wierd cause my Priest stared in my eyes the whole time i was suprised if he even looked away the whole time. I didn't feel he was in persona Christi either and neither did any of the other cantidates. So my first confession was VERY frustrating in the fact i didnt get a box confessional i didnt quite feel forgiven and i didn't even get penance. So umm yeah.
As I understand it, if you Confessed all your serious sins to a real priest with the canonical power to hear Confessions and didn't lie/hold anything back, and he said "I absolve you", you were forgiven. Period. Feeling or not feeling something does not have any intrinsic connection to the truth. Just ask St. John fo the Cross. (Ascent of Mount Carmel, book II.)
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1 John 4:7-12
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Parodyonlife
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 04:50 pm |
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I confessed my sins but its not off my conciounce. So am i forgiven? If i don't Feel forgiven and have to live with that on me, is it a healing?
Last edited on Fri Mar 21st, 2008 04:53 pm by Parodyonlife
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Hidden One
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 05:19 pm |
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I confessed my sins but its not off my conciounce. So am i forgiven? If i don't Feel forgiven and have to live with that on me, is it a healing?
Did he say, "I absolve you"? If he did, you're absolved. If not, go find another priest and listen carefully. If you are absolved, stop letting confessed sins pester your conscience. They are forgiven; better to forget them than to dwell upon them in fear. That work is of the Devil, trying to destroy your faith in the Sacrament of Confession (and by extension, the other 6 as well as your Catholicism and even Christianity). If you are absolved, your soul is healed of every sin you committed up until your Confession. They no longer impede your relationship with God.
If your priest was doing it properly, he said, at the end, "Go now in peace." Heed those words, whether he said them or not or you don't remember.
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1 John 4:7-12
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Intercessor
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 05:22 pm |
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John, did you include all mortal sins you could remember?
Did you express genuine remorse for those sins?
Did you hear the priest say, "I absolve you. . . "?
I didn't have any good feelings after my first confession either, John.
I was embarrassed, nervous, uncomfortable. I lost my voice at the end and was crying. Within a few hours I realized I had failed to include all the sins of selfishness and impatience.
I had a talk with my priest and told him about my misgivings and that I had not felt peace and had not "felt forgiven." I asked him what I needed to do.
He was wonderful and guided me through a second confession covering whatever had not been included in the first confession, even prompting me, where necessary. We discussed how Satan did not want me to experience a sense of peace. He also explained beginner's scrupulosity to me.
John, that second confession was a totally different experience for me. When I left the priest, I felt relaxed, happy, peaceful, and grateful. For days I was floating over the joy and release.
I would encourage you to have an honest conversation with your priest. If he can't help you work through this and reach peace, you probably need to find a different confessor.
God bless,
BeckyLast edited on Fri Mar 21st, 2008 05:36 pm by Intercessor
____________________
"If our charity is arrested by the difficulties encountered in dealing with our neighbor, . . . our relations with our brethren are not regulated by our love of God, but by our love of self." Divine Intimacy p. 781, Fr. Gabriel, O.C.D.
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Parodyonlife
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 05:23 pm |
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It's not just me though 4 other people are saying it also. So presently im confused im going to try our other priest next confession.
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CajunRick
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 06:14 pm |
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Parodyonlife wrote: It's not just me though 4 other people are saying it also. So presently im confused im going to try our other priest next confession.
John, being forgiven does not mean forgetting. Guilt is one of the temporal consequences of our sins. We know we have offended God and even though we know God has both forgiven and forgotten our sins, we still remember them. My wife mentioned something to me this morning that happened 25 years ago (no, it wasn't a fight, just an observation that I had "done that before") so even though the incident was minor then and insignificant now (actually, it involved me misplacing a screw driver of all things), it is still part of memory.
I treated my first girlfriend very badly when we broke up. She had long since forgiven me (actually, she died many years ago) and her husband told me at her funeral she had always spoken fondly of me and had only good memories, but I still feel guilty for the way I treated her. I will never lose that feeling of guilt but that's OK, because it helps me remember not to make the same mistake again. I have been much more aware of other people ever since, and much more considerate of their feelings. I learned from it. There was probably no sin involved in the situation, just a lack of consideration, and it was several years before I came to realize what I had done. As my faith grew, I reinterpreted my earlier actions and came to realize just how wrong I was.
So if you confessed your sins honestly and completely, felt true remorse, and heard the priest absolve you, you are truly forgiven. Maybe he felt that the difficulty most people have with confessing was enough of a penance in itself for your first time. Maybe he felt that your participation in RCIA (or whatever equivalent process you are involved in) is satisfying your need to repent. That's his call, not yours. Not every confession is a mystical experience.
Especially on this day when we commemorate Jesus' death for our sins, rejoice! The Blood of the Lamb has wiped away your sins, and soon you will be able to partake of the fruits of the sacrifice, the Precious Body and Precious Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ!
____________________
Understanding is the reward of faith. Therefore seek not to understand that you may believe, but believe that you may understand. - Augustine
Rick Luquette
Luquette Lane
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Parodyonlife
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Posted: Fri Mar 21st, 2008 08:45 pm |
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If you say so 
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